A Special Gift For Celebrating Halloween, Jill-Style
In memory of my mother-in-law
I’m interrupting my usual food memos to write about my mother-in-law, Jill Frisch, who died on Saturday, October 12th surrounded by her family, after years of battling cancer. She inspired so much of what I bring to the world. In her memory, you’ll find a free download for my e-book Seasonal Family Almanac PLUS, which includes 12 recipes for food and DIY crafts that didn’t make it into the published copy of my book (two are PERFECT for Halloween).
Jill Frisch had a way of moving through the world with absolute presence, attention to detail, curiosity, playfulness, quick wit, and always, a BIG smile.
I admired—and sometimes envied—how she had managed to retain what we often perceive as the best qualities of childhood.
As you can imagine, this made her an exceptional grandma.
She could recite hundreds of poems and songs on demand.
When I was pregnant with my first daughter, I told her, “I can’t remember any children’s songs! Will you teach me some of your favorites when the baby is born?”
She said, “Oh, don’t worry… they’ll come to you.”
Over the past eight years, whenever she heard me singing to the kids, she’d laugh and say, “See, I told you you’d remember!!!”
Jill also had a deep love for nature and all its quirky gifts, especially spiky ones like horse chestnuts, thistles, and teasel.
She remembered the name of every plant she met, and a fun fact to go with it!
We were out for a walk one day with her dog, Spirit, when she saw teasel and said, “Ayla, from Clan of the Cave Bear used that to brush her hair!” Shortly after, Bobby and I began reading the book series, which led us to name our eldest daughter after the powerful protagonist, Ayla.
My youngest daughter’s middle name is Jill.
While songs and names are a big part of Jill’s legacy to her grandchildren, the greatest gift she gave them was a love for arts and crafts, especially crafts made with items from nature.
When Jill visited after each of our daughters was born, she was at a loss with how to help. She didn’t like to cook. She didn’t like to drive. So she settled on being a soft, warm place for them to nap.
BUT… from the moment the girls were able to grip a crayon or dot paint markers, Jill LIT UP.
This she knew how to do—and she LOVED it.
Over the next 8 years, the girls learned a wide range of crafts from Jill, from weaving potholders to making miniature cats out of wine corks, owls from pine cones, and fairy beds in seashells.
We would regularly receive a box FILLED with bags of acorns, horse chestnuts, pebbles, and other items, along with printed images of what to do with them.
In an era where parents are inundated with cheap, plastic toys, it was refreshing.
What’s more, not only did Jill reinforce the value of art, but the ways in which our creativity can celebrate what’s happening in the world outside.
When I began writing my second book Seasonal Family Almanac: Recipes, Rituals, and Crafts to Embrace the Magic of the Year, Jill pulled out several binders filled with arts and crafts activities that she had offered preschool children as a young teacher’s aide.
She helped me brainstorm several craft ideas in the book, including flower crowns in the spring, and pinecone bird ornaments in the winter.
Not only did Jill give me permission to feed my own love for art by weaving it into my daughters’ childhood, she allowed me to normalize making decorations instead of buying them.
As the girls get older, they increasingly beg me to buy decorations for every holiday, but I just can’t bring myself to do it. Commercial decorations are often cheap, easily breakable, and require storage for 11 months of the year. (If this is your jam, by all means go for it!)
This year, when they were envisioning a giant web with a big furry black spider, I insisted, “Let’s make it!”
And boy am I glad I did! Look at this web Ayla made!!! (We plan to paint it white and sew a big black furry spider to put on it. Let’s see how far we get…)
Spider webs are powerful symbols of the earth’s magic and mystery. They symbolize the web of life, and the cycles within, of life and death. They have been said to symbolize the way our ancestors are woven into the fabric of our lives.
What better time of year than now—when it is said that the veil between the worlds of the living and dead are thin—to weave a spider web and immerse yourself and your children in its magic!
So, in Jill’s spirit of working with nature’s gifts to make art, I want to give you a little gift.
The e-book below contains 12 recipes for food, wellness, and crafts that didn’t make it into Seasonal Family Almanac: Recipes, Rituals, and Crafts to Embrace the Magic of the Year.
It includes two FABULOUS recipes for celebrating Halloween: Horse Chestnuts and Webs and Stick and String Horses (to giddy-up on!).
In Jill’s memory, I’d love to ask that you share this post with a friend who appreciates nature and art.
While everyone in Jill’s family and community navigates the varying levels and stages of grief as we transition into a world without our beloved mother, grandmother, sister, aunt, and friend—we are also finding solace and strength in the many ways she lives on within and around us.
I hope this little letter has been a vessel for sharing some of the light Jill brought to everyone she touched, and that it inspires you to go outside and make something beautiful.
Tender heart spilling with gratitude,
♡ Emma
PS. You might also enjoy my post about 6 Alternative Ways to Celebrate Halloween
Wonderful tribute. Sending you all a huge hug and lots of love. ❤️🩹
I am so sorry for your family’s loss. She was clearly a very special woman! ✨